{Girl Behind The Lens} Journey Into Photography...Part 2

So I left you on the last proper {Girl Behind The Lens} post about the start of my Journey into photography, and how starting my Career as an Assistant Manager, and the circumstances which surrounded it kicked my career into Photography…

I remember going for the interview for the Assistant Manager Job a glorious day and I took a wrong direction. Ended up going back to the place I found after my interview. Gorgeous rapeseed field, with white fluffy clouds and beautiful blue sky….that was May and I found out that day that I had the job.

Not that long after my Boyfriend (at the time) decided that we should go back to being friends…I didn’t let it phase me. I continued being interested in photography and finding out more and more within my new job and fitting in.

In the August the (Ex) Boyfriend and I had a major argument, then my Dad had a heart attack and in the process of all this I purchased the Pentax K10D. We ended up having a coach holiday to Ireland, which was beautiful - but didn’t really replace the Med Cruise Mum, Dad and I were meant to be going on.

One of my favourite images taken in Ireland

After our trip I joined the local Camera Club and entered some images on the night, including one that placed 18^th out of 36 images. Not bad for a picture that was taken during a moving bus ride through the window with a point and shoot camera...



The Competition Image


From this I ended as a Second Shooter, and I have to say I enjoyed my time as a Second Shooter and learnt lots about Studio work etc too. My Work Colleagues kept saying I was wasted in my job.
On 21^st June 2008 - my last day as Assistant Manager, and I got a part time job to focus more on the second shooting opportunities for the more you work at it the more you get out of it.

My First Portrait Session with a Colleagues Grandchild. December 2007.

This continued, and I shot Weddings, and lots of people and portraits in the studio, finding my style, my creativity and what I wanted to become as a photographer. Not always agreeing with people (and I will argue where needed!) and then it eventually became the big decision to go on my own…

This image caused discussion at the Camera Club as they believed I should have airbrushed out the dark crease on the childs head. a SEVEN WEEK OLD BABY. I argued that the reason women had such a distorted views on themselves was because some men were so flippant with the need to be "perfect"

The decision wasn’t because I didn’t like the person I was second shooting for. Wasn’t because I didn’t like my job. Wasn’t because I doubted myself…it was because I was beginning to hate it. I felt like I wasn’t allowed to shoot how I wanted to shoot (as a second shooter I know you cant!) and then I had a couple of friends getting married in 2010 who wanted me to photograph their wedding.

The HDR Phase. I never could do it "just a bit" but it worked really well for this shot at Leeds.
You Can't See Me!

The last Wedding I photographed as a second shooter was September 2009. The first Wedding Fayre I did was October 2009 and my first Wedding in October 2009...and then the journey really began.

One of my favourite idea shots. I had this idea in my head with Andi's Triquetra and went down to take the photograph
I have the unedited version too if anyone is interested in seeing it.

 

{Girl Behind The Lens} The Photoshoot

Now...I do have to say I keep getting told - to learn how it is to be infront of the camera...actually BE infront of the camera....

Well...I decided to do that to get some shots for this blog - something I can use on a post by post basis, and also to help people get up some more bits and pieces.

Well..Connie came up from Lincoln, and we got chatting and did some shots etc - I hated it. Kinda warmed into it - and am OK with some of the results...(I still dont like having my photograph taken!)

So...here are a few for your viewing pleasure....be nice! It was my first time modelling, and Connie's First Time shooting in the studio - editing has been done by me!

{Girl Behind The Lens} The Journey Into Photography

My 2nd Birthday Party with my Cousin. I'm the one in the Silver Wig...

Ok…so it looks officially like Monday’s are for the main {Girl Behind The Lens} Blog Posts! I have decided. It works quite well too, because unless I have a Wedding on, Sunday’s are generally the best day for me to write them. James goes to work at 9pm and I’m home alone till now, when my parents arrive home. I was just about to start the post when they started being noisy and distracting, so brought myself upstairs to write this so that you guys can have it today!

First of all I would just like to say that I was totally overwhelmed to the first official {Girl Behind The Lens} post, so many people telling me that it was so nice to see an honest and open post. If I cannot be myself, with myself in my life, and especially within my musings, then really - when can I be myself? I have self doubts that my real self will never be good enough - but you know what…TOUGH!

A lot of people have been asking how I got in photography and really where my love of photography came from.

When I was little, I loved taking photographs, I loved looking at photographs, I loved hearing stories about what happened the times the photographs were taken. They were memories, snapshots, a moment trapped and treasured forever. They couldn’t be broken.

These three Guys, the reason I believe Pictures never change, even when the people do.
We used to have "Guys Nights Out" and all through the fun, and laughs, there were some tears.
All three are friends on Facebook, the one in the middle, is now one of my past clients, having done
his wedding to Victoria in August last year.

One of my favourite quotations is “pictures never change - even when the people in them do” because it is so true. No matter what goes off, or goes wrong, if you look at a photograph you are transported back to there, when it was taken, who you were with, and it sparks off a memory. This is the underlying passion for my photography, because I know how looking at older photographs makes me feel. It reminds me of the things I thought I had forgotten about, the good times. It reminds me of the sad times, the friends I no longer have. But it also reminds me of me…and how I’ve changed and where I’ve come from and to, and how I’ve grown, and developed over the time. (I promise there wont be too many puns!)

This post isn’t going to cover how I got into photography…its more going to get up to the point of getting into the photographer, its like the beginning chapter, a taster to make you want to read on.

I remember being about 3 or 4 when I had my first camera, or at least, loved taking photographs. Some of the photographs I’ve taken, probably show that I was probably younger than that when I developed the need to take photographs of Barbie and Ken against a door and posing. Maybe its just fate I should become a Wedding Photographer!

I remember being visited at home by the Headmaster of the Primary School I was going to, and hiding behind the door, with a camera. It had no film in it, but I kept jumping from behind the door - pretending to take photographs. I’m a little more stealth like now…I hope!

The scowl in the photograph should say it all. I still hate having my photograph taken now.

If you’re reading this and there’s old photographs to accompany this entry, be happy…I’m riffling through them whilst I am also typing this entry…there could be some fun ones, some strange ones, and some obscure ones, but at the end its all about the journey, and how I am where I am today….

Ok…I totally got distracted by the photographs - I have a really big pile but going to narrow some down and get them scanned in tomorrow morning.

I never had dreams or aspirations to become a photographer, it wasn’t something that was “heard” of much. Most people became a miner, or worked in retail, or became a teacher, or a nurse. BIG aspirations. A photographer never focussed on the forefront - nor did being self employed. I wanted to be a nurse, or a teacher. I didn’t want to be a Doctor, that was too much hard work and responsibility…a nurse helped and looked after people. I remember when my Nan was in hospital, when the nurses used to wear paper hats clipped into their hair (seriously I AM only 26!) and they gave me one so I could pretend to be a nurse. We have no photographs of it, as Nan was in hospital. Now it would have been snapped with a camera phone, and therefore captured forever.

I went through school, doing relatively well in my Exam’s mostly Bs & Cs (one D in RE, the lesson I was mainly bullied in. Quite funny considering it was a Catholic School!)
I couldn’t decide what to do at College, I did think about becoming a Physics teacher. I studied, Geography, Physics, Maths and Psychology. Then I did first year maths again (it was bloody hard work!), second year physics and psychology, and first year English. I wasn’t confident. I didn’t particularly like college. I went through some bad times when I was there, met some fantastic people and lost some good friends. I planned on doing 3-years at College, to get a variety of A levels and AS Levels then go to Uni when I had decided what I wanted to do…In my 3rd Year I was studying, second year English and Georgraphy, First year Law and Media...I hated Media and it was pointless.

A scan of some of my fantastic College and Millennium Volunteer friends.
We were on a night out and one Pub always took polaroids for I think £2

In my 3^rd year of college I dropped out. I wanted to drop Media and the college said no. If I didn’t attend I would be kicked out. I told them what to do - and got a full time job within a week…

My working career started at 17 when I started college (oh to be a September baby!) and literally I’ve done lots of weird and wonderful things. I can sell you a bed, to a bathroom, to a PC or an Engagement Ring. I can change a watch battery and shorten a strap, as well as know the entire process of most Jewellery related items. I can tell you all about Pawn Broking and Pay-Day Advances, and sell you a speed loan - but that’s mainly just because I’m awesome.

Old Wembly. Barnsley VS Ipswich. Year 2000

What happened upon starting my Career as an Assistant Manager, and the circumstances which also surrounded it. I never knew that it would be the start of a rollercoaster ride of emotions, chances, dreams and aspirations….and the most important journey to start doing things for me. Jewellery trade looked to be the way I was going, eventually to be running my own shop (for a company) and then also doing training for the company along side that....I didnt think starting work there would be the start of the Journey to where I am now...

{Girl Behind The Lens} Copying Vs Inspiration

Whilst I know that this blog is really about learning more about me and my business today I’m going to write a little post on what really irks me with the industry, and life in general.

I don’t know whether it’s the social media and people trying to make their feelings known to other business’ but there is a big deal at the minute of things being copied, and everyone is copying something of someone’s.
If this was an issue, then surely Pizza Hut and Pizza Express for instance were in trouble - I mean surely the business models are different but the outcome is the same - they both sell and make pizza!

But anyway, this post isn’t about pizza’s its about what it stands for.

To see someone do something and for you to think “I could do that” is inspiration. For you then to go and do that, and put your own spin on it - is to some people copying. Its not though is it? And then people think “this person is going to drive me out of business” and for why? Because they’re underselling you? No..

People sell things, and generally they either like them or they don’t. They either like the price or they don’t. If you are looking for something specific, and it’s a unique product and you only know one company that sells it - you have no choice.

James is currently looking to purchase a house and the estate agent has been terrible - however, we really like the house so we have no choice.

When I was buying my car, I went to several different people. I knew what I was looking for it was just finding the right thing for the right price.

Look how many famous artists have been “copied” and a lot very successfully. But a real piece of art will go for millions more.

What I’m getting at is unless things are patented or copyrighted you really don’t have a leg to stand on and cannot complain about being copied.

Now the copying I’m not talking about is ripping off websites word for word and stealing pictures. I’m talking crafts and people doing similar things. People could have done what you do for years, but never had the presence. People may think “that’s so unique” - people will use different products, wont spend as much on marketing, and therefore wont charge as much - its like pricing in any industry. So they’re then not copying you AND undercutting you to steal your business - they’re just doing it for them.

I looked at purchasing some gorgeous things for my friends baby, and in the end I took inspiration and made him something myself. Now - this would be seen as “copying” to some people - and its not. I took time, effort, and did it my own way. If people then get in touch and see it and want something similar I’ll do some more. I’m even thinking of doing craft fayres locally that are “cheap” but just to give me something different - am I copying? No…its just a sideline - and something that people wont have seen much around here. Will I be undercutting? Probably…because It’s then a side of the business - and not the bread and butter it’s an “option” and a “hobby”. Will it take off? Who knows…am I worried? No - because its an option not the main part of my business.

Its like photography, there are a lot of us about. We all do same/similar things. Some people complain that there are too many and its driving down the cost of the business in what we do. I’ve been going 18months and put my prices up. Twice. I price myself on a structure that works for me, that brides relate to. I’ve spoke to other people and its not worked for them. It works for me. Am I undercutting people? Some yes. But in a way not…

What I’m trying to say is if you worry too much about what is happening out there, then you’re wasting energy. If you’re a damn good business, then you’ll make it if you have the determination, and the ones that’s “copying you” will either do well, or you wont hear from them in 6months time…stick to what you do - make you your own unique selling point and no one can copy or compete with that.

{Girl Behind The Lens} All About Me...

Gosh - what started as a seemingly really good idea, turned into something that now means I have to sit and write and tell people about me and what I do. And then as soon as that happens you think to yourself, what if people don’t like me, what if they think I’m a sham, what if they think that I’m not XYZ like people think I am. But then I breathe a little bit and I remember - I’m human. People buy people - a lot of my clients have become really good friends. I know about their pregnancies before most of their families and friends and they ask me questions about me and my boyfriend as they’re all friends on Facebook. But it all makes more sense and totally why I have an entire personal approach to the photography that I do - its what makes me able to tell the story a lot better.

So me…its hard to write about me, let me write about you…seriously!

I am currently 26-years old, female (obviously) and girlfriend to my wonderful boyfriend James. I still live at home with Mum and Dad, although as I write this James and I are looking at houses for him to purchase and me to move into.

I am full time self employed, a little bit crazy and I’m told that’s why most people love me.

I love to have a laugh, and have a bubbly personality, in general, and I am a self confessed flirt (once upon a time) and a definite people person. However, I can get grumpy and sad (I’ll explain more about this soon) and love a good cry as the next hormonal woman - however a lot of who I am is more about the life choices, decisions and what I have gone through to get to me.

Now everyone kept saying “I don’t want to pry - I just want to know more about you personally” so therefore, there should be no holds really barred.

Most people know I don’t take things lying down, unless I really have to. So it will be surprising for most people to know that I was bullied for about 13-years. This still makes me uncomfortable in certain circumstances and its another reason why I’m louder, and apparently funnier around certain people than I am in others. Not many people get to know the 100% bottom line that is the real me. One of my friends said I let everyone have about 95% and the other 5% is kept for me. Some people might know a different 95% than the next person but no-one fully knows me 100% - I’m not sure I agree with that.

I have Endometriosis. Now men all I have to say is….it only affects women (now they all run away screaming and covering their eyes) however it on the other hand means two things. I’m generally in pain, and on strong drugs (that’s one) and in the future I may or may not be able to have babies and may need IVF. However, it is also lovely to know that one of my Brides (Amy) has the same, very severe and has just given birth to gorgeous baby Alfie, after falling pregnant naturally. These are things to think about in years to come, and I will not be a pregnant photographer for a long while yet. As much as I have loved following Julia Boggio’s I carried a Watermelon Blog, I’m not in no rush to write my own yet.

I suffer from depression. Currently I am off medication and functioning fine, I get stressed relatively easy in the grand scheme of things, unless I am shooting a Wedding, then I’m generally chilled out. I however, have clinical depression and due to the endometriosis and long-term pain they all go hand in hand. I am lucky to know and understand when I need to be back on my medication, and have currently been 10 months medication free.

I am a good listener. And also people seem to trust me, with their deepest secrets. I could probably cause the start of World War Three with some of the things I know - but I am not one of these people who will use things against people. I’m not nasty and don’t see the point in being nasty to get revenge. But sometimes I can be a bitch. I’m human.

So now lets get onto the randomness:

I can roll my tongue.
I can touch my nose with my tongue.
I can speak random words in Maltese and Filipino
I sang at the Millennium Dome (now 02 Arena) when I was at school, as part of “Our Town Story”
Music wise, I was born in the wrong era, and should have been a 50’s/60’s child.
I can sing, when I try and need to - but can sing badly out of tune in the car but that’s allowed.
I have lots of allergies, including most antibiotics, and opiates (codeine, morphine based drugs)
I have never broken a bone in my body that I am aware of
I am my own biggest critique
I doubt myself
I get self conscious
I can be quite spiritual
I have my tarot cards read at least once every 6months
My eyes are blue, but they change colour because I'm weird like that.
I have a really wonky nose considering I've never broken it.

This has probably given people more food for thought or to ask questions etc, if you have a question you would like to ask - then please let a note with it in!

And be gentle, comments are welcome, this is my first Girl Behind The Lens post - more will be coming....until next week!